Valentine's Day Dranks

i hear ya.

Growing up with a Valentine’s Day birthday meant giving out cards and candy to others, when really all I wanted to do was shout out that it was my birthday at the top of my lungs. Today, I’m much more civilized: I tell complete strangers that it’s my birthday whether they want to know or not (New Yorkers love this). By the way, what makes a complete or total stranger different from just a stranger? I have been known to grab a cocktail (or three) with a stranger that I’ve just met. I like to call it dating. Which leads me back to the ultimate dating holiday - Valentine’s Day. I plan on drowning my single sorrows with some Valentine’s Day cocktails. Join me!

The Sassy Lassie 

This will impress any dude (Mainly because there’s Scotch in it).

  • 2 oz. Usquaebach Reserve blended Scotch whisky (Manly liquor designated for those who own homes with libraries and fireplaces in them or Ron Burgundy)
  • 1 oz. Amaro Lucano (This is NOT an Instagram filter. I repeat. This is NOT an Instagram filter)
  • 2 strawberries (These are large berries that you may be familiar with)
  • Dash of chocolate bitters (Dark chocolate’s liquid cousin)
  • Shaved Dark Chocolate (Please don’t add an entire chocolate bar’s worth unless you also want to gain 5 pounds)
  • Slice of Strawberry (This is what adults use as a garnish)

Add strawberries and bitters to a mixing glass and muddle. Add ice, scotch, and amaro. Stir until very cold. Strain into a cocktail coupe (not a small car filled with booze but a short-stemmed glass). Garnish with chocolate shavings. Fit strawberry slice onto the rim of the glass (or skip this step and shove it in your mouth).


Don’t feel like making it yourself? If you’re in the New York City area, stop by Les Halles and ask for the Sassy Lassie ($15). Tell them I sent you.

Kiss Me Mule 

Perfect drink to walk your mule around with (And by mule, I mean your Valentine).

  • 2 oz. Four Roses Bourbon (No roses were hurt in the making of this alcohol)
  • 1 oz. house lemonade (Not to be confused with “home” or “abode” lemonade)
  • .5 oz. pure cane simple syrup (You can make this yourself or just steal some from Starbucks)
  • Strawberries (If you don’t know what these are we have a bigger problem)
  • Basil (Oregano’s more fun sibling)
  • Ginger Beer (Not to be confused with ginger-infused beer. Although I might have to try that)


Combine bourbon, lemonade, and simple syrup. Muddle basil and strawberries together and top cocktail off with ginger beer and garnish with strawberry on rim.

If you know me, you know I love a good mule. My name is Pony, after all.* The folks over at Jacob’s Pickle on the Upper West side have shared their Valentine’s version called the Kiss Me Mule. If you like ginger beer and Bourbon, you’ll love this romantic cocktail.

*This refers to an old college nickname that has stuck with a handful of people. Sometimes I also #nay.

El Pepino Fresco 

Fresh cucumber (Ladies, don't immediately grab those cukes and put them on you eyes - it will sting). 

  • 2 pc. Cucumber
  • 1 oz. Fresh Lime
  • ½ Simple
  • ½ St. Germain (not the fluffy dog that likes to also moonlight as a police officer)
  • 2 oz. Tequila (Use Patron. Duh.)

Shaken, strained, rocks, kd, Peychaud’s bitters float, and cucumber.

The only time I ever drink something with cucumber in it is at the spa. However, the gang over at Randolph Broome have created the El Pepino Fresco for all the lovers out there. This is a cocktail I’d like to think that Amy Schumer would be downing while she berated her masseuse.


BubblyCarly PetroneComment